Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Keeping it Clean

I still have not gotten the H1N1 vaccine, despite the encouragement from my smarter, more prepared friends. It seems to have gone missing from San Francisco; every site I search says that is is not currently available. I don't feel overwhelmingly worried about it, since I spend much of my day working at home, but I would like to get it taken care of soon. Ellie gave me some good advice recently, which included the line "leave your house as little as possible and try not to touch anything."

I found these to be wise words, and decided to follow them. But I really had to get out of the house, and thought a walk would be harmless. On my walk, I passed the DMV and realized I needed to get my license renewed. So I entered the DMV. This was like spitting on the swine flu gods. The DMV must be the perfect place for the flu to breed. Everyone touches pens and papers, counters and chairs. They sit around just breathing on each other. I waited in a little chair for about an hour, studying the Rules of the Road booklet, because I have basically not driven a car in about 4 years, and I couldn't remember which one was the gas pedal, let alone how far back one's car has to be when stopping at train tracks (15 feet.)

Oh, and I had to take the test because my California license expired on my birthday last week. If you charted my life solely using my driver's license, it would actually appear that I never left California to go to New York.

When my number was finally called, the guy behind the counter looked at my paperwork, which included a voter registration sheet. "Democrat," he said. "Aw yeah, Barack Obama."

"Ok." I said, because the only other appropriate option seemed to be a high five, and that didn't strike me as the greatest idea, flu-wise. I am not above high-fiving DMV employees, though, especially this one, because after talking at length about why Kim Jong Il wanted Bill Clinton to come to North Korea recently "Because of the WEED!", he let me get my license without having to take the test.

I walked to the line to get my picture taken, secure in my newfound knowledge on the best light for driving in fog (low beams), the appropriate speed limit when near a school (25 mph), and the DMV guy's thoughts on Obama's cigarette smoking habits, "He's not quitting now!"


Nina said...

it's too bad you don't work at goldman sachs- sorry, couldn't resist. i'm with ellie on the "avoid touching things" and avoid crowded enclosed spaces (e.g the DMV!). i'm assuming you've already tried community centers?

Catherine said...

e-mail your NY ob and ask where and how they would suggest you get the H1N1. You might also call a local clinic and impress upon them that we have a multitude of lawyers in the family(way too many) if you should be unlucky enough to have caught the flu from the DMV guy who was passing out free things, like your pass on the test.

Ellie said...

Apparently SF is getting a big shipment next week and swine flu vaccine should flow like, well, weed in SF. Which is good news unless you were hoping to leave the house this weekend.